Did My Mother Die In Vain?

 

It has now been two weeks since my mother crossed over & one week since her funeral & Celebration of Life.

A dormant aspect of my Spirit that I have never been aware of has now awakened resulting in a profound & permanent opportunity to experience my life on my own terms.  Like an ancient mythical beast resurrecting from the primordial earth, a flame is rising within me that burns my past trauma away.

My quest for truth prepared me for what I believed would be a devastating, soul shattering loss 11 years ago.  I was terrified of losing my mother during and after a lifesaving/threatening heart surgery in early 2008.  The fear of death had a power over me my whole life and it rose up to choke me at that time.

Ten years and an unwavering dedication to unearthing and healing the abuse I endured has paid off.  I have graduated to become the new Matriarch of a family crippled by trauma.  I see it all with the clarity of the Eagle’s eye.

Choosing exponential healing methods, training & generous support have invited me to rise to a higher vibration.  To release the identity of fear, anxiety, hate & guilt shame & responsibility for family circumstances out of my control as a young child.

To come out as an empowered woman who spoke her truth to family of origin many of which I have not encountered since being shunned 35 years ago is indescribable.  This was not the old me determined to attack & get my vengeance for the hate that was put upon me.

The vibration of higher awareness pulsed through me resulting in discernment. I saw those people for who they were.  Generations of a culture/religion raised in a Survival Mentality based on self-hate which pits parents against their own children, siblings against each other & a tribe that rejects/hates other cultures.  Those who questioned were cast out.  Those who did not submit were crucified socially, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

This method is a form of false power that eats away at the soul.  I honoured my mother who fought to disentangle herself from this regime.

My message had a ripple effect that only time will tell of its effects.  When we align with the truth of our real self, there is no need to scream and yell who is right and who is wrong.

My mother’s struggle will not go unnoticed.  My mother did the unthinkable.  She spoke and lived her truth despite the cost.  And it cost her her dignity, friends, family, her health and much much more.   

 

 

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